


In the Meantime

by shai



Category: Imperial Radch Series - Ann Leckie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-16
Updated: 2014-05-16
Packaged: 2018-01-25 09:32:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1643924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shai/pseuds/shai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seivarden isn't good at dealing with the aftermath of anything. She has a conversation with Anaander Mianaai on the station, before she knows Breq survived.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In the Meantime

Seven hours after Breq set off to stop the Lord of the Radch boarding Mercy of Kalr, Seivarden has shot two Anaander Mianaais, yelled at more Radchaai officials than she has for years, and very nearly made friends with Skaaiat Awer. The crisis is over now: she's been poked at by a medic and sent away with orders to rest up. 

Seivarden isn't sure where to go to rest: she gave up her lodgings, and she doesn't want to go back to Breq's room before they've talked. First things first, though: she makes her way to a public terminal to speak to Station. 

There is, Station tells her, no record of the shuttle the Honored Breq hijacked coming back in to land. 

It keeps talking after it says that, its voice polite and level. Seivarden doesn't hear any of the words: her fingers are digging in to her ribs painfully, and her pulse is too fast. She must look twitchy as hell, just like she had the first few weeks coming off kef.

Breq would be looking at her with that very patient kind of disapproval she had, frowning just a little bit. She could keep it up for hours, as if what she meant by that frown was 'I expect better'.

Amazing, how much that kind of thing came to matter after a while. Seivarden could picture Breq's face like she'd got a holo of it right there, that stern expression and the way it turned to a little gesture of approval when you gave in and did what she wanted. 

There's a little click from the terminal, the sound of a two-way communication starting up. Seivarden can't quite bring herself to look up and see who wants to talk to her. She doesn't need to, though: from the first syllable, Anaander Mianaai's voice is unmistakeable. 

“Seivarden Vendaai. Report.”

Seivarden's seen and heard a lot of different Mianaais in the last few hours, some in pain and some angry, some worried and some smug and some dying. This one is utterly authoritative, as calm as she would be during a policy broadcast. It's infuriating. To hear her, no-one would think there was anything wrong. 

“... How do I know you're the right one?” 

“I could sing to your friend, if she's available.” 

“Breq hasn't come back to the station.” Seivarden says. 

The Lord of the Radch arches one neat eyebrow. She's about to make some comment about Breq's name, and all of a sudden Seivarden can't face hearing it. She starts talking before she has too, too loud: “She died to stop the other you.”

“You are a loyal creature, aren't you?” Anaander observes, “I thought the daughters of Vendaai prided themselves on their independence.”

“I stand by my friends.” Seivarden says. This isn't strictly true, not historically speaking, but right now she means it. 

“Why? Because you're waiting for her to take you as a client?” 

“Because I owe her my life.” Seivarden bites out. Her hands are shaking. She wraps them around her waist again. “Where is she? Did she get to Mercy of Kalr?”

“You spent years in service to the Radch,” Anaander says, “Is this ancillary the only person to have saved your life?” 

Breq isn't an ancillary, Seivarden thinks, furious. She knows she can't say that, though, and it takes a minute to think of a different reply. “It wasn't her job to save me.”

“Oh?”

“She chose to do it.” Seivarden can't pin down why that matters so much, but it does, so she says it again: “She didn't even like me, and she chose to save me anyway.”

There is no reply for a long few seconds. Seivarden has been talking with her shoulders hunched up, not meeting Mianaai's eyes. When the silence goes on a bit too long, she looks up at the terminal screen, and the Lord of the Radch is looking directly at her. 

Seivarden can't tell what she's thinking.

“Well, your saviour lives,” Mianaai says. Her voice is light, as if that's all she'd called up to say. “She's in suspension for now: she depressurised that shuttle to defend the station, and there was some internal damage to her lungs. It's nothing that can't be fixed, but she's in the hospital for the time being.”

Relief hits Seivarden so hard it feels a solid force. It must show on her face: Mianaai makes a gesture – you're welcome – and has Station pass over the location. 

...Later, after Breq's been brought out of suspension, Seivarden thinks through the conversation again. She realises there's something odd about it: Anaander Mianaai started the conversation by asking for a report, and signed off without hearing one. Whatever she'd called up for, it wasn't that.


End file.
